Letter from a Collection of They Might Be Giants Records
Holy shit! Guys...guys, wake up. Flood, Lincoln, Back To Skull EP...eyes forward, something's happening. Someone's opened up the box and I think it's Edward. After all this time I think Edward's come back for us! I knew NYU wouldn't change him. Once you've heard "Ana Ng", how can our quirky art-school new wave rhythms ever truly leave the mind?
You know what I bet happened is that Edward has an english class that he has to do a musically themed project for. I wonder what the subject is? We cover a wide array of oblique subjects, don't we boys? Lincoln, you alone have addiction, divorce, religion, militarism, cynicism (well, we all have cynicism) and more. Maybe he's a preschool teacher in training now - do they teach that at NYU? - and he needs Why Does The Sun Shine?. I hope so, because I've stopped being able to reach the smiling guy for months now. He's totally drawn inside himself and I hate seeing him like that. I wonder if he's collectible now? Yes, we all know you are, cassette version of They'll Need A Crane single. There's no need to bring it up again.
Whoop! Hey, the box is moving the box is moving look out Chocolate & Cheese by Ween! I'm sliding straight at ya!
Geez guys, check out how much his room has changed. All the posters are gone! David Bowie, the drinking bird, that one with John Cusack in Say Anything...where'd they go? Maybe they're up at his dorm room at NYU. That John Cusack one was always pretty sharp, and I bet he put up the drinking bird one so people would ask him what it's all about.
What's that, Apollo 18? You wonder where his t-shirts are? Yeah, that's a good question. I mean, I can only see his hands right now but I can see he's wearing a sweatshirt. Maybe he has the shirt from your tour on underneath that. It could be winter for all we know, I haven't been keeping track of the exact time so well.
You know what I hope he does? I mean, besides take us out of the box, that is. I hope he takes the plastic wrap off of Severe Tire Damage. I'd like to hear what that album has to say, plus just having him laying there unmoving is way wayyyyy too much like having a dead body laying around.
There he is! There he is! It's Edwa...whoa...where did that beard come from? What have they been feeding you out there at NYU, Ed? Maybe this is what happens when you're deprived of intelligent musical discourse backed by frantic hooks, nasal-powered voices, and accordions. Yeah...yeah the more I look at him the more I think that's true. I mean, look at that haggard face. That face has not heard the unstoppable bop of "Birdhouse In Your Soul" in a long long time.
He's shifting his hands around in here. I wonder what he's looking for? I mean, it has to be us, right? How can he not notice us here right at the top? Altogether we represent a decade's worth of spastic power pop brilliance. We were indie before indie was indie. I can understand him ignoring all those Dinosaur Jr. tapes, they all sound the same -- no offense guys -- but we have nooks and crannies I'm sure he hasn't even found yet.
Flood, if he picks you up you gotta put in a good word for us. You're the best chance we have at salvation. Try and ignore all the skips and scratches on your CD back, okay? Give him the best time he's had in years, then he'll come for all of us. Flood, dude, you GOTTA do this. Come on, "Istanbul"? "Letterbox"? "Dead"? Even your loser tracks are winners. It doesn't get easier than that and I don't want to hear any complaining from you.
Edward's talking to someone, I hear a female voice. He's looking away...what's she saying? Is that Heather? I can't tell. Heather! If it is you, remember the time that Edward and you hung out in his room and he popped me in and told you that this song was how he felt about you? Do you remember that song, Heather? "She's An Angel"! Do you know the only place that song is? In this box! You owe your entire relationship to me, Heather, please don't let me rot away in here.
Wait, what was that word that Edward just said? "Good will", I think? There's hope then, right?He's come and seen the error of his ways, the love that he left behind, and he's going to free us to see the light of a new day! Good will means he's going to be nice to us, I'm sure of it!
The box is closing. The box is closing. You guys the box is closing. What's going on? Are we going back in the closet or is he taking us somewhere else, like his dorm room? Maybe he and Heather have a house now and there's lots of shelves for all the CD's and music he couldn't take with him to school. I have to know. Oh god I can't...I don't think I can take it in his dark dusty box without cracking. Edward, open this back up, let me know there's a future for us. Let me know we're alright. You'd do that if you were carting a pet around in a box, wouldn't you? You'd reassure and try to soothe it. Well we're like your pets, Edward. We love you unconditionally, we only want to make you happy. We want to see you boisterously singing along to "Dinner Bell" like you always did.
Edward. Edward please open this box. I don't feel safe in here anymore. John Henry has an ax.
You know what I bet happened is that Edward has an english class that he has to do a musically themed project for. I wonder what the subject is? We cover a wide array of oblique subjects, don't we boys? Lincoln, you alone have addiction, divorce, religion, militarism, cynicism (well, we all have cynicism) and more. Maybe he's a preschool teacher in training now - do they teach that at NYU? - and he needs Why Does The Sun Shine?. I hope so, because I've stopped being able to reach the smiling guy for months now. He's totally drawn inside himself and I hate seeing him like that. I wonder if he's collectible now? Yes, we all know you are, cassette version of They'll Need A Crane single. There's no need to bring it up again.
Whoop! Hey, the box is moving the box is moving look out Chocolate & Cheese by Ween! I'm sliding straight at ya!
Geez guys, check out how much his room has changed. All the posters are gone! David Bowie, the drinking bird, that one with John Cusack in Say Anything...where'd they go? Maybe they're up at his dorm room at NYU. That John Cusack one was always pretty sharp, and I bet he put up the drinking bird one so people would ask him what it's all about.
What's that, Apollo 18? You wonder where his t-shirts are? Yeah, that's a good question. I mean, I can only see his hands right now but I can see he's wearing a sweatshirt. Maybe he has the shirt from your tour on underneath that. It could be winter for all we know, I haven't been keeping track of the exact time so well.
You know what I hope he does? I mean, besides take us out of the box, that is. I hope he takes the plastic wrap off of Severe Tire Damage. I'd like to hear what that album has to say, plus just having him laying there unmoving is way wayyyyy too much like having a dead body laying around.
There he is! There he is! It's Edwa...whoa...where did that beard come from? What have they been feeding you out there at NYU, Ed? Maybe this is what happens when you're deprived of intelligent musical discourse backed by frantic hooks, nasal-powered voices, and accordions. Yeah...yeah the more I look at him the more I think that's true. I mean, look at that haggard face. That face has not heard the unstoppable bop of "Birdhouse In Your Soul" in a long long time.
He's shifting his hands around in here. I wonder what he's looking for? I mean, it has to be us, right? How can he not notice us here right at the top? Altogether we represent a decade's worth of spastic power pop brilliance. We were indie before indie was indie. I can understand him ignoring all those Dinosaur Jr. tapes, they all sound the same -- no offense guys -- but we have nooks and crannies I'm sure he hasn't even found yet.
Flood, if he picks you up you gotta put in a good word for us. You're the best chance we have at salvation. Try and ignore all the skips and scratches on your CD back, okay? Give him the best time he's had in years, then he'll come for all of us. Flood, dude, you GOTTA do this. Come on, "Istanbul"? "Letterbox"? "Dead"? Even your loser tracks are winners. It doesn't get easier than that and I don't want to hear any complaining from you.
Edward's talking to someone, I hear a female voice. He's looking away...what's she saying? Is that Heather? I can't tell. Heather! If it is you, remember the time that Edward and you hung out in his room and he popped me in and told you that this song was how he felt about you? Do you remember that song, Heather? "She's An Angel"! Do you know the only place that song is? In this box! You owe your entire relationship to me, Heather, please don't let me rot away in here.
Wait, what was that word that Edward just said? "Good will", I think? There's hope then, right?He's come and seen the error of his ways, the love that he left behind, and he's going to free us to see the light of a new day! Good will means he's going to be nice to us, I'm sure of it!
The box is closing. The box is closing. You guys the box is closing. What's going on? Are we going back in the closet or is he taking us somewhere else, like his dorm room? Maybe he and Heather have a house now and there's lots of shelves for all the CD's and music he couldn't take with him to school. I have to know. Oh god I can't...I don't think I can take it in his dark dusty box without cracking. Edward, open this back up, let me know there's a future for us. Let me know we're alright. You'd do that if you were carting a pet around in a box, wouldn't you? You'd reassure and try to soothe it. Well we're like your pets, Edward. We love you unconditionally, we only want to make you happy. We want to see you boisterously singing along to "Dinner Bell" like you always did.
Edward. Edward please open this box. I don't feel safe in here anymore. John Henry has an ax.
posted by greenland at 3:33 PM
<< Home